Murphy's Law Of Attraction

Because anything that can go wrong when I meet a guy, usually does.

Read and make an informed decision.

Havana House (club)Older scarey-looking guy: You smell really nice.

Me: Thank you.

Older: You smell so nice I think you deserve a drink.

Me: No thank you, I just had one.

Older: Well, if you change you're mind let me know. But you do smell real good.

Me (thinking to myself) "Boy, you know damn well I smell like ten packs of cigarettes in this smokey-ass club."

Stoplight in Burbank (Man begins to cross but stares at me instead)

Crossing man: DAMN, you're pretty!

Me: (laughing) Thank you.

Crossing man (walking toward the driver's side of my car): I don't give a f*ck, you only live once, but my name is (I forgot already) and it's nice to meet you (grabs my hand to shake it).

Me: (nervous laugh) Ooookay.

Crossing man: Will you marry me?

Me: uh . . . no.

On phone with Westwood Sports

Man: Westwood

Me: What are your hours today?

Man: Who is this?

Me: Carrie. Is this Westwood Sports?

Man: Yeah. You want to talk to Terry?

Me: No, I want to know what are your store hours.

Man: Well, I'll be there until 6 o'clock.

Me: Okay.

Man: Who is this? Do I know you?

Me: No, I'm not even from this area?

Man: Well, what's your name? Do you want lessons? (meaning tennis)

Me: No, I actually give lessons. What I do want is string.

Man: Okay. What's your name?

On a actual "date" with a much younger guy walking along the waterfront

Man-child: I've been wanting to ask you out for so long.

Me: Really?

Man-child: You are surprised?

Me: Well, I'm glad you . . .car approaches us and driver (older woman) yells out

Older Woman: Did you need me to pick you up?

Man-child: Grandma, I told you I'll call you when I'm ready!

Originally written June, 9, 2007 (yet nothing has changed)


Recent Posts

See All